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11th September 2013: The world's gone mad and I'm the only one who knows
13th August 2013: Black is white. Fact. End of.
11th August 2013: Electric cars, not as green as they're painted?
18th June 2013: Wrinklies unite, you have nothing to lose but your walking frames!
17th May 2013: Some actual FACTS about climate change (for a change) from actual scientists ...
10th May 2013: An article about that poison gas, carbon dioxide, and other scientific facts (not) ...
10th May 2013: We need to see past the sex and look at the crimes: is justice being served?
8th May 2013: So, who would you trust to treat your haemorrhoids, Theresa May?
8th May 2013: Why should citizens in the 21st Century fear the law so much?
30th April 2013: What the GOS says today, the rest of the world realises tomorrow ...
30th April 2013: You couldn't make it up, could you? Luckily you don't need to ...
29th April 2013: a vote for NONE OF THE ABOVE, because THE ABOVE are crap ...
28th April 2013: what goes around, comes around?
19th April 2013: everyone's a victim these days ...
10th April 2013: Thatcher is dead; long live Thatcher!
8th April 2013: Poor people are such a nuisance. Just give them loads of money and they'll go away ...
26th March 2013: Censorship is alive and well and coming for you ...
25th March 2013: Just do your job properly, is that too much to ask?
25th March 2013: So, what do you think caused your heterosexuality?
20th March 2013: Feminists - puritans, hypocrites or just plain stupid?
18th March 2013: How Nazi Germany paved the way for modern governance?
13th March 2013: Time we all grew up and lived in the real world ...
12th March 2013: Hindenburg crash mystery solved? - don't you believe it!
6th March 2013: Is this the real GOS?
5th March 2013: All that's wrong with taxes
25th February 2013: The self-seeking MP who is trying to bring Britain down ...
24th February 2013: Why can't newspapers just tell the truth?
22nd February 2013: Trial by jury - a radical proposal
13th February 2013: A little verse for two very old people ...
6th February 2013: It's not us after all, it's worms
6th February 2013: Now here's a powerful argument FOR gay marriage ...
4th February 2013: There's no such thing as equality because we're not all the same ...
28th January 2013: Global Warming isn't over - IT'S HIDING!
25th January 2013: Global Warmers: mad, bad and dangerous to know ...
25th January 2013: Bullying ego-trippers, not animal lovers ...
19th January 2013: We STILL haven't got our heads straight about gays ...
16th January 2013: Bullying ego-trippers, not animal lovers ...
11th January 2013: What it's like being English ...
7th January 2013: Bleat, bleat, if it saves the life of just one child ...
7th January 2013: How best to put it? 'Up yours, Argentina'?
7th January 2013: Chucking even more of other people's money around ...
6th January 2013: Chucking other people's money around ...
30th December 2012: The BBC is just crap, basically ...
30th December 2012: We mourn the passing of a genuine Grumpy Old Sod ...
30th December 2012: How an official body sets out to ruin Christmas ...
16th December 2012: Why should we pardon Alan Turing when he did nothing wrong?
15th December 2012: When will social workers face up to their REAL responsibility?
15th December 2012: Unfair trading by a firm in Bognor Regis ...
14th December 2012: Now the company that sells your data is pretending to act as watchdog ...
7th December 2012: There's a war between cars and bikes, apparently, and  most of us never noticed!
26th November 2012: The bottom line - social workers are just plain stupid ...
20th November 2012: So, David Eyke was right all along, then?
15th November 2012: MPs don't mind dishing it out, but when it's them in the firing line ...
14th November 2012: The BBC has a policy, it seems, about which truths it wants to tell ...
12th November 2012: Big Brother, coming to a school near you ...
9th November 2012: Yet another celebrity who thinks, like Jimmy Saville, that he can behave just as he likes because he's famous ...
5th November 2012: Whose roads are they, anyway? After all, we paid for them ...
7th May 2012: How politicians could end droughts at a stroke if they chose ...
6th May 2012: The BBC, still determined to keep us in a fog of ignorance ...
2nd May 2012: A sense of proportion lacking?
24th April 2012: Told you so, told you so, told you so ...
15th April 2012: Aah, sweet ickle polar bears in danger, aah ...
15th April 2012: An open letter to Anglian Water ...
30th March 2012: Now they want to cure us if we don't believe their lies ...
28th February 2012: Just how useful is a degree? Not very.
27th February 2012: ... so many ways to die ...
15th February 2012: DO go to Jamaica because you definitely WON'T get murdered with a machete. Ms Fox says so ...
31st January 2012: We don't make anything any more
27th January 2012: There's always a word for it, they say, and if there isn't we'll invent one
26th January 2012: Literary criticism on GOS? How posh!
12th December 2011: Plain speaking by a scientist about the global warming fraud
9th December 2011: Who trusts scientists? Apart from the BBC, of course?
7th December 2011: All in all, not a good week for British justice ...
9th November 2011: Well what d'you know, the law really IS a bit of an ass ...

 

 
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Our friend D*** S*********** sent us this document which he acquired during his student days. Neither he nor the GOS can swear to its authenticity - its use of language is crude and we've tidied up some odd spellings and punctuation - but if it is genuine it certainly rings a bell or two in the light of recent world history …
 

 
America's Foreign Policy
 
Report from Iron Mountain

 
In 1963 an American Professor of Sociology was informed that he had been selected to serve on a commission whose objective was "To determine, realistically and accurately, the nature of the problems that would confront the United States if and when a condition of permanent peace should arrive, and to draft a programme for dealing with this contingency."
 
The report was produced in early 1966, and was immediately suppressed by the government committee responsible as being too unsavoury for public release.
 
After a period of doubt the professor has broken his silence on his own account. This following passage is a prècis of the final section of the report.
 
"War fulfils certain functions essential to the stability of our society, and until other ways of fulfilling them are developed, the war system must be maintained - and improved in effectiveness. Lasting peace, while not theoretically impossible, is probably unattainable. Even if it could be achieved, it would almost certainly not be in the best interests of a stable society to achieve it."
 
A. Nature of War (i.e. functions). Non-military functions of war are:
1) Economic:
War is the only known proven system for stabilising and controlling national economies.
2) Political :
The possibility of war is the foundation of stable government. It is the basis for acceptance of political authority. It enables society to maintain class systems. No governmental ruling group has survived the certainty of future peace.
3) Sociological:
War provides the machinery through which the violent destructive motivational forces that govern human behaviour have been expressed and translated into pro-social purposes. It is a socially cohesive factor for national survival.
4) Ecological :
The main historic devices for balancing food & population.
5) Scientific :
The fundamental motive for scientific progress.
 
B. Substitutes for the functions of war : Criteria
The above functions must be fulfilled if social systems (as we know them) are to survive. Therefore substitute institutions must be found to fulfil these functions. These substitute institutions must satisfy certain criteria: technically feasible, politically acceptable, and potentially credible to society.
1) Economic :
a) Any substitute for war will have to require money spent on non-productive purposes on the scale of present military expenditure.
b) It must be subject to arbitrary political control.
2) Political:
A viable alternative to war politically must present an external menace to each society sufficient to require the organisation and acceptance of political authority.
3) Sociological:
a) Institutions must be developed to control anti-social motivations
b) It must generate a threat and fear of personal destruction to secure adherence to social values that are acknowledged to be greater than the value of individual human life.
4) Ecological :
Any substitute for war must maintain present living standards in the West at least.
6) Scientific :
A substitute must necessitate scientific development.
 
Substitutes for the functions of War : Models
1) Economic :
a) Comprehensive social welfare system for the improvements of the general conditions of life.
b) Open ended space programme aimed at impossible targets.
c) Ultra-elaborate disarmament inspection system.
2) Political :
a) Omnipotent international police force.
b) Extra-terrestrial menace.
c) Global environmental pollution.
d) Fictitious alternative enemies.
3) Sociological; Control Function

a) Variants on the peace corps model.
b) Modern sophisticated form of slavery.
Motivational Function

a) Environmental pollution.
b) New religions or myths.
4) Ecological :
Comprehensive programme of applied eugenics.
5) Scientific :
Secondary requirements of space research, social welfare, and/or eugenics programme.
 
General Conclusions

1) Although the economic function of war can be replaced, the political and social cannot.
2) Although in the short term it is safer to choose peace rather than war, in the long run the reverse is true.
3) The war system cannot be allowed to disappear until we know what the replacement will be, and that it will work.
4) The government should plan for two contingencies:
a) The possibility of lasting peace.
b) Successful continuation of the war system.
 

 
The GOS says: See? Told you so …
 
If anyone recognises this document or knows anything about it, please let us know.

 

 
The truth revealed
 
A*** F******** has unearthed these two internet references,
 
http://www.museumofhoaxes.com/iron.html
 
http://www.prouty.org/lewin.html
 
which explain the provenance of the document. So it was all a hoax after all - shame. Thanks, A***
 
The GOS says: OK then, but if this was a hoax perpetrated in the late 1960s and revealed in the 1970s, how come so many of its predictions appear to have come true in the last twenty years? Is it a case of "Many a true word spoken in jest …"? Or are Americans just very predictable?
 

 

 
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